GoThere was a time when this wasn’t always so in my life…
It’s so funny because many people look at me and assume that I have always had the ideal life and that I radiate with confidence and happiness. Many people assume that perhaps I was the popular girl in high school and that I have lived a charmed life, which when I think about it is actually quite flattering…lol! However, once people hear my real story, they’re usually pretty shocked.
I grew up with an Asian mother who and an American dad. My mom was new to this country and she first married my dad, she didn’t speak a word of English, which is what my dad actually preferred in a woman, so once my mother learned how to talk back and express her feelings, that’s when the honeymoon ended. My dad was very aloof, and he was more interested in his newspaper, TV, personal survival and chasing other women than he was in building a strong, loving family structure and my mother was unhappy, stressed and physically and verbally abusive.
I was always the extremely shy, unpopular girl in school with little to no friends as well as being chubby, with knots in my hair and my mother dressed me horribly in clothes that didn’t match, knee-high red stripped athletic socks with blue and yellow track shoes with dresses and since my family was always struggling with money, it was cheap looking clothes and I had just 5 outfits that I rotated throughout the week, though out the school year. YIKES, no wonder I was made fun of!
Growing up, my older brother was called the smart one and adored by my mother and I was called the dumb one and treated like a helpless, useless little girl.
Pretty much every day in school since grade school, I was bullied, ostracized and made fun of by the other students and my teachers were putting me down for not trying hard enough and not doing well enough in school work, therefore I learned at a very early age, if I couldn’t be praised for my grades and school work, then I’m going to get rewards and praise for being the best behaved and obedient kid in school, so that’s where I learned that my personal survival and rewards came from keeping my mouth shut, smiling and doing the best I can to please not only the teachers but anyone around me. I learned that my needs and feelings didn’t matter, because I wasn’t good at anything else but being a good obedient girl.
I developed extreme anxiety and stress issues since very young since I was either a punching bag from someone or being scolded by teachers for my inability to keep up with the rest of the class or get my homework in on time.
I hated myself and my life since a young age and I had often fantasized about ending my life. In my teens, I used to save up apple seeds in a bag with the intention of making arsenic with them some time,because I heard somewhere that apple seeds contain trace amounts of arsenic.
By the time I was only 21, all of the years of stress, anxiety, and suicidal depression got to me and I had a breakdown, so I went to a mental professional and I was immediately put into a recovery hospital with other addicts for 28 days, only my addiction was extreme co-dependency (people pleasing).
Ok folks, this looks like this about me page is turning into a book, so rather than go into detail, I'll bullet point everything, just so you can get an understanding of my experiences:
Sexually molested as a child
Grew up in a family always broke and struggling for money
Bullied and mistreated by students and teachers in school
shy and unpopular
severe anxiety and stress since a young age
abusive & narcissistic relationships
Got taken advantage of by an abusive con-man
Was kidnapped by abusive con-man when I got away the first time
Lost everything, including bank account, car, credit cards, perfect credit score, self-worth, because of the abusive con man
attempted strangeling by con-man
had to leave the country to get away from con-man
physically and emotionally abused as a child
work trauma from consistent sexual harassment, sexual exploitation, and attempted rape from most places I worked at in the past
Extreme Poverty (I used to have pick dandelion leaves and saute them with rice and sometimes beans, so I can eat at least somewhat healthy.
Lost a thriving modeling and acting career because of lack of confidence and low self-esteem
Took me 14 years to get regular clients and profit from my business, because I didn't believe in myself or my business.
You know how there’s always that one thing in your life that no matter what you have tried, all of the courses, investments, diets, visualizations, books and so on you do, there is your ONE big issue whether it be love, weight loss, money, career, clear skin, that you can’t seem to find your key to unlocking your own secrets? Well, money and career success was my BIGGEST challenge that I just couldn’t seem to figure out why NOTHING was working for me, all of the affirmations, positive thinking, working late hours, going into adrenal fatigue and putting my nose to the grind stone, doing things I didn’t like to do, NOTHING was working for me, I was still consistently broke and struggling in building my dream career and I gave up many, many, MANY times!
My life was also full of chaos and mess, I mean my car was always dirty and messy, my home life, my mind, EVERYTHING!
I absolutely HATED myself and I HATED my life, I thought that God has cursed me for some bad that I did in this life or my past life and I really believed that God had a “special click” that I was not allowed to be a part of!
And then I eventually began to wake up and I discovered after many years of searching and investing in business and money programs that wern 't working for me, that it wasn't about the skill, it was about my own lack of confidence and belief in myself and it was also about the work and money trauma that I had experienced years earlier, that greatly influenced my lack of success.
IT ALL STARTS FROM THE INSIDE
I took a few steps back and I stopped investing in the coaches who told me that following their online marketing plan or their simple 5-step system was going to change my life in 90 days or jump me to the top of the ladder of success instantly, I stopped beating myself up for not being able to instantly manifest money, clients or something that will save me from debt by doing a vision board and a few affirmations. Instead, I started working on my confidence, self-esteem, personal beliefs about myself, and my own personal power. Believe me, every cell of my body kept wanting to run back to my old ways and invest in those overnight success immediate gratification coaches, which to be honest with you I did give in a couple of times and invest and both of those times, I ended up getting stuck again, my business that suddenly took off crashed again and I was now in financial debt to these coaches! By the way, on a side note many of these coaches are AMAZING with a great track record, but from my experience you have to be ready by first investing in building your confidence, mindset and success habits and have your foundation set in place before you can have any real success investing in Jane the Online Marketing Genius!
EVERYTHING NATURALLY FALLS INTO PLACE
So this is the very interesting and unexpected thing that happened to me when I surrendered and I began applying building my confidence and taking baby steps. The more I trusted myself, the more things worked out and the more my confidence grew the more I trusted myself even more to take more ACTION and RISKS things just began to fall into place naturally! I stopped worrying about the how and I just kept moving forward in the direction that my flow of life was taking me and I stopped beating myself for not being perfect and not enough!
So this is what happened ON ITS OWN WITHOUT FORCE!
· I naturally started to keep my car clean and I enjoyed it, I didn’t even think about what I was doing.
· I naturally started noticing things around the house and picked it up
· After living in the same house for years, I saw things that needed to go and a simple rearrangement of the furniture and a couple of inexpensive add on’s changed the whole look and feel. This was stuff that my mind never saw before!
· My business started flowing in the right direction and I gained clarity on what I do and whom I am.
· Clients just came to me without trying to hard (that doesn’t mean that you don’t have to work at it and take action!)
· Manifestations began happening more easily and frequently
· My circle of friends grew and my social life grew with loving friends (remember, I had pretty much no friends in high school and most of my life.)
· My negative mother, who always told me I had no future, tells me she’s proud of me and believes in me.
· My income grew and became more consistent.
· My organizing skills in a way that works for me fell into place on its own
· Narcs and abusive people aren’t as drawn to me as before and those who do come into my life, I now know how to shut them down without them taking away my power.
· Success and financial power is no longer an impossible dream for me, every step that I take each day puts me in the right direction because I know how to follow it.
· My intuition has increased so much that I have to hold myself back at times from telling a stranger things that I intuitively know about them.
· I have a fun, loving, supportive relationship…by the way, remember earlier I was telling you about the emotionally abusive guy who rejected me and put me down almost everyday and who I was with when I was just wishing to die? Yeah, that’s him, I didn’t even plan this or force any change on him, everything just shifted and changed on it’s own when I chose to love and change myself!
I discovered the real key to unlocking my own breakthrough secrets and now I’m so incredibly excited to have my own career where I can teach you these secrets as well and with full support, so that it doesn’t take you years of pain and figuring this out like it did me!
You are not the only one, afraid of making the wrong decision
You are not the only one, worried about what others will think
You are not the only one, to feel vulnerable
You are not the only one, to feel stupid, shy, not important or unpopular
You are the only one, who can believe in yourself and follow your hearts desire, learn from your past, give thanks for today and change your future.
Want to know more? Contact me today !
Thanks for dropping by!
My list of accomplishments and Credentials
· Certified Hypnotherapists and NLP practitioner
· Certified EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) practitioner
· Certified Law of Attraction coach
· Certified Guided Imagery Practitioner
· Confidence Coach
· Member of the American Hypnosis Association
· Professional public speaker
· Former Top Model
· Award-winning writer
· Published author
· Professional writer
· Online publication contributor
· Former successful commercial actress
· CEO of This Chick Is On Fire
· Founder of Ignited Women Network and Women Worry No More group
· Traveled through most of Europe
· Flew in a helicopter from breakfast in Paris to lunch in Nice then drove to Dinner in Cannes and late night caviar and eggs in Monaco in 1 day!
· Lived in Thailand for 4 years
· Went from homeless and hopeless to harmony and happy
· Ran my own catering and event planning business
· Expert on self-esteem, self-confidence, anxiety, stress and money and work trauma
· Dog lover
· Wine lover
· Healthy food lover
· Lover of life
Hi, I'm Jentana Lee Dabbs, founder and CEO of This Chick Is On Fire success coaching and hypnotherapy for women. I’m so excited to be sharing my story with you because it’s really been an enlightening journey to get to this point. As I’m writing this, I’m joyfully looking at a nicely decorated living room that feels good to be in, my home feels at peace and harmony, my boyfriend and I dance with the dog in the kitchen EVERY MORNING and I’m being serious, we have a selection of upbeat songs that we dance to and raise up our energy and makes our dog super happy. I recently came back from an incredible trip to the Bahamas (a trip that I manifested) I haven’t worked for anyone in years, I have an amazing group of girlfriends and after I finish writing this, I will be preparing for a beautiful dinner party I’m hosting for my girlfriends. In fact, I’ll be running out the door in a clean car to go grocery shopping and then to the gym, because I have the flexible time to do this. I go to many events and social gatherings and I can honestly say that I feel loved from the people around me. I even have a wonderfully supportive man in my life who encourages me to build my business, write my book and he does what he can to help out when I need it. And every day, I see evidence of my manifestations working for me and my path becomes more clear and abundant everyday and I recently found a list that wrote a few years back of what would success look like to me and I actually now have and could do everything on that list that I believed represented success. That really blew me away! Most of all, I am experiencing the peace, joy, love and abundance that I never thought I would experience. By the way, when I say “abundance” it’s not always about money; it’s EVERYTHING in our lives, because EVERYTHING is connected. It’s love, friendships, food, laughter, fun, celebrations…but I’ll go more into this later.